Morning Page 3

I've started a writing ritual each morning, this was something I wrote on the third day after starting...

As I wake up nowadays I try to get some sunlight into my eyes early, first before peering into a screen or unnatural light source. It’s something I learned recently, it’s science. Apparently the body’s natural rhythms are dictated by natural light, for example being gently told, “it’s time to wake up” by the actual hues and wavelengths in different types of natural light.

Is it really true, and will I ever know? Who knows.

I think we do this type of thing a lot as humans. Sometimes we think of them as rituals, habits and practices. Other times they drift into a grey area called superstition and religion; things that mentally make us feel good, that we’re on the right path and doing the right thing.

What is “right” really? Why do we feel the need to be right?

I have been meaning to write more in my life. But the creative outlet to do so, and to create is what’s driving my desire. I want to make something, be able to point at it and say that I made it. I did something, and brought something into the world that wasn’t already there.

I don’t think everyone necessarily has this desire, although it’s probably there in some form for everyone however small. What is this fascination with creation? What is this creativity?

These types of sensations are really what separates humans. Is that true? Perhaps we’ll never really know, other than some scientific paper coming out to tell us we’re right, or better our inner most sense telling us so with deep conviction.

Would artificial intelligence ever feel the need to be on the right path? Would it feel the desire to create? Probably not, although it may tell us it wants to. Or, a researcher may discover some heuristic to convince the world that AI has these very human emotions and feelings.

In my mind these types of feels are what we call God. A big statement, maybe. But something within us drives us to do things. Enables us to see things. Brings out our capability to conquer ourselves, and other obstacles that stand in our way.

In Hinduism, we have a God for this. Ganesha, widely known as “the elephant God.” People say he’s a real God. He was created by the God couple Shiva and Parvati (Gods are great creators of course). Parvati, Shiva's consort, created Ganesha to protect her while Shiva was out hunting. Upon Shiva’s return Ganesha blocks him from entering his own abode. Incited after a quarrel with Ganesha, Shiva beheads Ganesha. Parvati is incensed. This is where the elephant part comes in. Shiva replaces Ganesha’s head with the head of an elephant and brings him back to life.

Ganesha is known as the God that removes obstacles. Millions (billions?) of people stand by this and pray to him. Why? Maybe they have an obstacle in their way that needs to be removed to achieve a goal. But more often than not, I think perhaps they themselves are the obstacle. And it helps to have a mental tool to overcome the challenges of day to day life.

You’re not doing well in school? Pray to goddess Saraswathi. Trouble with strength? Hanuman is here for you.

Whether or not these figments of our imagination are real, or were once real beings - does it matter? For many people they’re brilliant devices that allow coping with day to day life. Is that not a venerable end in and of itself?

I was brought up in a deeply religious culture. Perhaps this is the reason when seeking truth in my later years I rejected it. I became an atheist at heart, although certain cultural rituals felt “right.” The compulsion to reject religion came from an entirely separate realization.

Rituals and tools that make you feel good and get you through your day are great in theory. We need these tools, they allow our otherwise troubled existence as humans to course correct.

However religion has this nasty tendency, or perhaps it’s used by outside forces for the purpose of making wrongdoing feel right. Religion is uniquely positioned to make it feel right to deride, call into question, harm or even want to kill. What if a ruler sees an obstacle in her way to achieving her goal, to conquer all the land? God could be a good tool to galvanize her troops, and lead them down “the right” path to victory.

It’s this duplicitous nature of religion, and the two sides to humanity in general, that complicates things.